Marriage, separation and divorce

What is a de facto relationship?

A de facto relationship is a domestic relationship between two adults who live together as a couple and who are not married or related to each other. There are a number of factors that can be used to determine whether a relationship is a de facto relationship, including:

• length of the relationship
• if you live together
• is there a sexual relationship
  
• the extent of financial dependence 
• do you have children
• is there public acknowledgement of the relationship.

If you are unsure whether or not you are in a de facto relationship, you should get legal advice.

I'm in a de facto relationship, can I register my relationship?

Registration of a de facto relationship provides legal recognition for a couple, regardless of their sex.

Registration is not a requirement for your de facto relationship to be recognised.

If you or your partner live in NSW, your relationship can be registered with either the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages or Service NSW. You can apply to register your relationship online and the certificate will be posted out to you. Counter services at NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages are no longer available. If you can’t apply online, you can either use a drop box at the Registry office or lodge a paper application in person at Service NSW service centre. 

For more information or to register a relationship, see Apply to register a relationship in NSW on the Service NSW website.

A registered relationship certificate will enable you to get entitlements, services and records under NSW law. 

Before you register your relationship, you should get legal advice.

I have applied to register my de facto relationship less than a month ago, but we have separated, what can I do?

You can withdraw your application within 28 days of the date of the original application.

You can make a sole or joint application. 

There is no fee to withdraw your application to register your relationship.

You won't be able to get a refund of your application fee. 

For more information, see Withdrawing an application on the Relationship register page on the NSW Government website or Withdraw your application to register your relationship on the Service NSW website.

My de facto relationship is registered but we have separated, what can I do?

If your relationship has been registered and the 28 day cooling off period has expired, you will need to apply to have the registration of your relationship revoked.

To do this, you must prepare a statutory declaration and pay the fee. You must also serve notice on the other person which can be done in person, by mail or by email.

There is a cooling-off period of 90 days before the registration is revoked by the Registrar.

You should lodge your revocation application with the service you applied to.

For more information, see Apply to revoke a registered relationship on the Service NSW website.

When can I get married?

​You can get married if you are:

• over the age of 18
• under 18 but over 16 and you have a court order
• not legally married to someone else
• marrying someone you are not related to. 
  

If you are under 18 and want to get married, you should get legal advice.

I want to get married. What do I need to do?

If you want to get married, you ​​​must give at least one months' notice of your intention to marry to the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages and pay the relevant fee. 

To do this, you will need:

• a completed Notice of Intended Marriage form available from the Attorney-General's Department website or from your celebrant
  
• you and your partner's original birth certificates or passports, and
• if either party has been previously married, a Divorce Order or former spouse's Death Certificate.

Documents in a foreign language must be translated to English by an accredited translator. NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages will not accept photocopied documents. 

You must give these documents to your celebrant or NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages at least one month before your intended wedding date.

Counter services at NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages are no longer available. If you can’t apply online, you can either use a drop box at the Registry office or lodge a paper application in person at Service NSW service centre.

For more information, see Notice of Intended Marriage application on the Service NSW website.

Can I get married at a registry ​​office?

The NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages can perform marriage ceremonies at some of its registry offices. You need to make a booking and will still be required to provide one months' notice before your wedding.

The fees for a registry marriage also include the fee for your notice of intention to marry, ceremony costs and marriage certificate.

For more information, see Registry weddings on the NSW Government website.​

Are civil ​​marriages valid?

A civil marriage is legally valid if it is performed according to the law. It is different from a religious marriage, performed by a religious celebrant.

Civil marriages are common, and can be conducted by a private celebrant or a celebrant at a NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages registry.​

I am planning to get married overseas. How can I prove that I am not already married?

You can apply to the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages for a single status certificate.

To do this, you must complete the application form and pay the fee. 

You can lodge your application by post with NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages or in person at your nearest Service NSW centre.  

For more information, see Single status certificate on the NSW Government website. 

If I get married overseas will it be recognised in Australia?

Most marriages performed overseas will be recognised as legally valid in Australia if they were made according to the laws in that country. The exceptions to this are polygamous marriages (being married to more than one person) and if a party is under 18. These marriages will not be recognised in Australia.

If you need to prove you were married overseas, you should provide a copy of your Marriage Certificate. You may need to get this translated if it is not in English.

If you were married overseas, you do not need to register your marriage in Australia.

​​Can I mar​​​ry​​ my same-sex partner?

Yes. The Marriage Act 1961 (Cth) was changed on 9 December 2017 to allow same sex couples to marry in Australia. The Act now says that marriage is 'the union of two people to the exclusion of all others, voluntarily entered into for life'.

If you would like to get married you can lodge your notice of your intention to marry with the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages.

If you married overseas before the change in the law, your marriage is now recognised in Australia if it was valid in that country when you got married.

​Is a s​ame-se​​​x ​marriage performed overseas recognised in Australia?

Yes. The law changed from 9 December 2017 to recognise same-sex marriages performed overseas. If you were married overseas before the change in the law, your marriage is recognised in Australia if it was valid in that country when you got married.

​​Can I get my marriage cer​​tif​icate translated?

In some circumstances, the Department of Home Affairs prov​ides a free document translating service for Australian citizens and migrants settling permanently in Australia. 

For more information, see Free Translating Service on the Department of Home Affairs website.

You can also arrange translations through Multicultural NSW Language Services, or through a private company. You will be charged a fee for this service.

For more information, see Video and telephone interpreting on the Multicultural NSW website.  

​​Can I get marri​​ed to more than one person?

In Australia, you c​an't be married to more than one person.

It is an offence to marry someone in Australia if you are already married. This offence is​ called bigamy. ​

​Are a​​rranged marriages legal?

Arranged marriages in Australia are legal if they are performed according to the law.

The people getting married must:

• not already be legally married
  
• not be in a prohibited relationship, for example, brother and sister
  
• be over the age of 18, unless there is a court order
• freely consent to marrying.

If you ha​ve concerns about an arranged marriage, you should get legal advice about your situation.

​I am worried that I'm going to be forced to marry someone. What can I do?

​​​​Forced marriage is when a person gets married without freely and fully consenting, because they have been coerced, threatened or deceived.

Forcing someone to marry is a criminal offence, and the marriage will not be legally valid.

It is also an offence to bring someone to Australia or take someone out of Australia to force them to marry. 

​​If you are in a forced marriage or are worried you are going to be forced to marry, you can get help:

• ​The Australian Federal Police (AFP) can provide initial advice if you are in, or at risk of, a forced marriage. For more information, call the AFP on 131 237.
  
• My Blue Sky is a website dedicated to preventing and addressing forced marriage in Australia. For more information, go to the My Blue Sky website. 

​Do I have to​ change​ my name after ​I get married? 

There is no legal requirement to change your name after you marry. There are many rea​sons why people choose to change their surname or to keep their surname. For example, you may want to change your s​​urname so that you have the same surname as your spouse and children.

It is up to you if you wish to change or keep your surname​​. 

​​​How do I change my name now that I am married?

Most government departments and organisations will accept a standard Marriage Certificate issued by the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages (Registry) as evidence of your change of name. For example, Transport for NSW (formerly known as Roads and Maritime Services) will accept a Standard Marriage Certificate to have the name on your licence changed to your married name. You can then use ​your new licence as identification. ​

You should check with the individual organisation or government department ​​whether it has any specific requirement. ​

The Registry now allows you to change your name online, and the certificate will be posted out to you.

Counter services at NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages are no longer available. If you can’t apply online, you can either use a drop box at the Registry office or lodge a paper application in person at a Service NSW service centre.

From 1 May 2021, you can click & collect your Change of name certificate from the Chippendale or Parramatta NSW Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages if you purchase a priority certificate.

For more information or to change your name, see Register a change of name (adult) on the Service NSW website.

How can I prove we h​ave​ been sep​​arated?

Usually, you can prove you have been separated by:

• living in different accommodation 
  
• telling your friends, family and/or neighbours about the separation
  
• managing your finances individually
  
• not sharing usual activities, such as cooking, cleaning and shopping, if you are living separately under the same roof.
  

You should note the date you separated, as you will need this information if you a​​pply for a divorce or need to apply for a property settlement. 

Can we be ​se​​​parated under th​e one roof?

In some circumstances, you can still be recognised as separated despite living together.

You will still need to show that the relationship has ended and that you are living independently despite being in the same household, for example, you may need to show that you aren't sharing the cooking, cleaning and shopping, and that family and friends can give evidence you have separated. You might also need to show the reasons why you continued living in the same house, for example, for financial reasons, or to help with the care of children. ​

For more information, see Divorce factsheet 3: Separation under the same roof on the Ways to get help section of our website.  

Can I get a se​paration certificat​​​e​?

There is no certificate you can get when you have separated. It is a good idea to keep a​ record of the date you separated. If you apply for a divorce or property settlement you may also need evidence of your separation. ​

Can I apply fo​r an​​​ annulment of the ​marriage?

You can apply to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia for an order that your marriage be declared void (called a decree of nullity) if:

• your or your spouse was already married
  
• you were in a prohibited relationship
  
• you did not follow the laws around getting married
  
• you or your spouse were underage and didn't have a court order
• you or your spouse didn't consent freely because of fraud, mistake of identity, duress or mental incapacity. 

If you think you can apply for an annulment of marriage, you should get legal advice about your circumstances

In all other circumstan​​ces, the usual way of ending a marriage is to apply for a divorce. ​

For more information, see Applying for a decree of nullity on the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia website. 

Do I have to get d​​iv​orced?

There is no legal requirement to apply for a divorce after you have separated, but it may be in your best interest to get a divorce depending on your circumstances.

Either you or your spouse can apply for a divorce as a sole application, or you can make a joint application.

You have 12 months from the date your Divorce Order comes into effect to apply for Property Orders. 

Before you apply for a divorce, you should get legal advice. 

When can I get ​​a ​divo​​rce?

You can apply for a divorce if:

• you are legally married
  
• you have been separated from your spouse at lea​st 12 months
• your marriage has irretrievably broken down 
• you and your spouse are an Australian citizen or have been living in Australia for at least 12 months immediately prior to applying for a divorce
  
• you and your spouse have made appropriate arrangements for the care of your children. 
  

For more information, see Apply for a divorce on the My problem is about section of our website. 

​I was married overseas. ​​Can I get a divorce in Australia?

If you were married overseas, you can apply for a divorce in Australia if you or your spouse:

• are an Australian citizen
  
• ordinarily live in Australia, or
  
• have lived in Australia for 12 months immediately before applying for a divorce.​
  

For more information, see Apply for a divorce on the My problem is about section of our website. 

How does the time l​imit ​apply ​​if our relationship has been on and off?

The 12 month period starts from the date you or your spouse communicated to the other that you or they consider the marriage to have broken down. 

You can still apply for a divorce if you and your spouse lived together as a married couple for one period of less than three months after separating. 

You can count the first period of separation towards the 12 month minimum separation period. You can't count the time you lived together as a married couple. 

If you get back together for longer than three months, the 12 month period of separation has to start again.

For more information, see Apply for a divorce on the My problem is about section of our website. 

How do I decide​​ the​​ date of separation for the divorce application?

The date of separation is the date you or your spouse communicated the relationship was over and you separated.

I have been married for​​ less than two years and want to get divorced. Do I need to go to counselling?

If you were married for less than two years, you and your spouse must attend counselling. This is to ensure that there is no reasonable chance of you getting back together.

In some circumstances, the court may not enforce this requirement if one party refuses to attend counselling or it is unsafe to attend due to a history of violence.

If you have been experiencing violence, you should get legal advice about your situation.

How do I apply for a​ di​vorce?

To get a divorce you will need to apply to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia and pay the fee.

You can make a sole application or joint application with your spouse.

​All Applications for Divorce should be completed on the Commonwealth Courts Portal.

For more information on how to register for the Commonwealth Court Portal, see How do I register for the Commonwealth Courts Portal? on the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia website.

If you make a sole application, you also need to serve your Application for Divorce on your spouse.​

For more information, see Apply for a divorce on the My problem is about section of our website.

What will the court consider before granting a divorce?

A court will make a Divorce Order if it is satisfied that:

• you and your spouse are married 
  
• your marriage has irretrievably broken down
  
• you and your spouse have been separated for at least 12 months
  
• you have correctly served your spouse with your application, if you made a sole application
  
• you and your spouse have made appropriate arrangements for the care of your children, if relevant.  
  

If the Court is not satisfied that all of the above criteria have been met, it will not grant you a divorce.

For more information, see Divorce Order on the My problem is about section of our website. 

​Can I apply myself or do I need​​​ my spouse to agree?

You can file a:

• joint application - if you and your spouse agree to get a divorce, or
• sole application. 

If you file a sole application, you must arrange to serve your application on your spouse. 

For more information, see Apply for a divorce in Divorce on the My problem is about section of our website. 

Do I have to apply for a divorce​ ​in Australia if I have been divorced in another country?

​If you got divorced in another country, it will be recognised in Australia as long as it was done in accordance with the laws of that country. 

If you are not sure whether your divorce will be recognised in Australia, you should get legal advice. 

What if I can't afford​ the fee for a​​ ​​divorce?

There are two different fee reductions you can apply for:

• general fee reduction
• fee reduction due to financial hardship.

​You may be eligible for a general fee reduction if you hold a government concession card. 

If you are not eligible for a general fee reduction, you can apply for a fee reduction due to financial hardship.

For more information, see Step-by-step guide - Apply for a fee reduction on the My problem is about section of our website.

Do I need a ​​​​lawyer?

You don't have to have a lawyer to apply for a divorce.

If you want a lawyer to prepare your application and represent you at the hearing, you will have to arrange one at your own cost.

Do I have to serve my spouse with my divorce application?

​If you have filed a sole Application for Divorce you must serve on your application on your spouse.

You must serve your spouse at least 28 days before the hearing if they are in Australia. If your spouse lives overseas, you must serve them with your application at least 42 days before the hearing.

You can do this:

• by hand, or
  
• by post.
  

​If you don't serve your spouse, or you serve your spouse outside the time limit, your application may be adjourned or dismissed. 

For more information, see Step by step guide - Serve your spouse on the My problem is about section of our website. 

How can I serve my spouse if they are overseas?

There are different rules of service depending on which country your spouse is in. 

For more information about how to serve your spouse overseas, see Serving a legal document across international borders on the Attorney-General’s Department website.

​​What if my spouse avoids​ service?

If you haven’t been able to serve your spouse by hand or by post because they have avoided service, but you are still able to contact them, you must ask the court for permission to serve them in a different way. 

For more information, see Substituted service and dispensation of service on the My problem is about section of our website.

What if I don't know where​ my spouse is?

The rules of service are very strict. If you can’t serve your Application for Divorce on your spouse, you must ask the court for permission to:

• serve them in a different way (substituted service), or
• not serve them at all (dispensation of service). 

For more information, see Substituted service and dispensation of service on the My problem is about section of our website.

What do I have to do if I have been served with an Application for Divorce?

If you have been served with an Application for Divorce you can:

• send back the Acknowledgment of Service, or 
• file a Response to Divorce. 

If you agree with your spouse’s Application for Divorce, you don’t have to do anything. You should send back the acknowledgement of Service so the court knows you received the application.

If you don’t agree with your spouse’s application, you can file a Response to Divorce.

For more information, see Respond to an Application for Divorce on the My problem is about section of our website.

​What if I disagree with the details on the divorce application?

If you have been served with an Application for Divorce and you disagree with it, you can complete a Response to Divorce.

You will need to file your response within 28 days of the application being served on you. If you were served overseas, you will need to file your response within 42 days of the application being served on you.

If you file a Response to Divorce and you are opposing the application, you must go to the hearing. 

For more information, see Respond to an Application for Divorce on the My problem is about section of our website.

​​Do I have to go to a divorce hearing?​

If you and your spouse file a joint Application for Divorce, you don’t have to go to the hearing (even if you and your spouse have children under the age of 18), unless you have said you will attend in your application. 

If you file a sole application, you don’t need to go to the hearing if:

• you and your spouse don’t have any children under 18 years, and
• your spouse does not oppose your Application.

You do need to go to the hearing if:

• you and your spouse have a child under 18 years
• your spouse opposes your Application, or
• you have filed an Application in a Case for substituted or dispensation of service orders. 

If your spouse has filed an Application for Divorce, you do not need to go to the hearing unless you have filed a Response to Divorce and you are opposing the application.

All divorce hearings are by telephone unless you have asked to attend in person, or the Court orders you to attend in person.

For more information, see Going to the hearing on the My problem is about section of our website.

​​What if I filed a response but didn't attend the divorce​​ hearing?

If you filed a response but didn't go to the hearing, the court may have not considered the issues you raised in your response. 

If the court decided that the criteria for granting a divorce had been met, it would have made a Divorce Order. 

​How do I get a copy of​​​ my divorce?

How you can get a copy of your Divorce Order depends on when you were granted a divorce. If your Divorce Order was made:

• after 13 February 2010, you can download a copy from the Commonwealth Courts Portal 
• before 13 February 2010, you must complete the online form Request Proof of Divorce from the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia and pay a fee
• before 1976, you must contact the Supreme Court in the state or territory where your divorce was granted.  

For more information, see Divorce Order on the My problem is about section of our website.

​​When does my divorce take effect?​

Your divorce will become final one month and one day after the court makes a Divorce Order.​ In some cases, the court can extend or reduce this time if there a​​re special circumstances.

​Can I get re-married before the divorce order is final?

You can't legally get married before the Divorce Order comes into effect. A Divorce Order comes into effect one month and one day after it is made by the court.

Can I appeal a divorce order?

You can appeal a Divorce Order if there has been a miscarriage of justice because of fraud, perjury, suppression of evidence or any other circumstance.

If you want to appeal a Divorce Order, you must do this within 28 days of the Order being made at court and before the order comes into effect.

Once the Divorce Order has taken effect, you can’t file an appeal.

Appealing a Divorce Order will stay (stop) the order from taking effect until the court hears your appeal.

For more information, see After Court on the My problem is about section of our website.

​​Do I have to change my name after I get a divorce?

There is no legal requirem​ent to chang​​e your name after you get a divorce. It is your decision whether you do this.

For more information, see After court on the My problem is about section of our website.

​​How can I change ​​​my​​​ name if ​I​ am divorced or separated?

How you can change your name will depend on:

• what you did when you started using your married name
• the changes you want to make to your name
• the organisation that you are trying to change your name with.

For more information, see After court on the My problem is about section of our website.

Can I divorce my parents?

No. You can't apply for a divorce to end a relationship with your parents. Divorce is only an option to end a legal marriage between two people that have been separated for at least 12 months. There is no legal process to end a relationship between children and parents.

If you are under 18 years old and you have concerns about your living arrangements or relationship with your parents, you can contact the Department of Communities and Justice or the Kids Helpline.

If you are over 18, and you want to disconnect from your family in some way, you could consider changing your name.

For more information or to change your name, see Register a change of name (adult) on the Service NSW website.